The Human Vs. Fly Battle....

(Originally Posted Thursday, January 27th, 2005)

The fly that had been plaguing me all night in my room as I played and fiddled with my itunes had finally made a fatal mistake.

All night I had been seeing him out of the corner of my eye, but he moved too quickly for me to follow...and way too quickly for me to grab my brand new electric fly swatter and fry the fucker.

Finally, he flew up the right side of me towards the wall right next to me on the left. I rose and backed up a foot or two to box him into the corner; he took refuge on the upper molding of my double doors.

We stared. We stared at each other for what lasted like ten minutes, it was probably only one. When I had ascertained that he probably wasn't going anywhere for the moment, I quickly snatched up by electric fly swatter (which will from now on be called Mary). We continued to glare at each other, but neither of us would budge.

I realized I had to make him move. I instantly thought of my gun, the orange plastic dart gun that shoots soft darts. I darted into my living room to get it, scrounged an old dart from under some old stuff, and cocked it.

Holding Mary in one hand, and my gun in the other, I aimed, and fired. I wanted to just get it to move, but I actually hit about an inch or less from it, and I may have actually hit it a bit, and it bounced off the wall and behind my desk. Crap. Couldn't find it. Looked, but no good.

Sat down to write this, and in the fucking middle of it the fly zooms out from under my desk. I grab Mary, but she's to no avail, the fly has dissapeared again. The battle continues...